By KAREN PARKER | County Line Editor
Things just happen. You know how it goes.
Ask Rep. Joel Kleefisch (R-Oconomowoc), who shortly will receive a ticket and be fined for shooting two turkeys, an adult male and a juvenile jake, with one shotgun blast.
Kleefisch thought he would just get a warning. After all, he did turn himself in. Or perhaps he thought that being married to Lieutenant Gov. Rebecca Kleefisch would earn him automatic immunity.
But you know how those DNR wardens sometimes get their panties in a pucker. It didn’t help that Kleefisch tagged the second bird with a tag from a different management zone and then removed it before the warden arrived. He told the warden he “searched his conscience” and evidently found it lacking.
And then there was that incident a few years earlier when Kleefisch dropped three geese (one over the limit) with one shot.
In yet another case, Kleefisch received a formal warning when a youth in his charge killed two turkeys with one shot during a mentored hunt.
That must have been the last straw for the warden, who recalled Kleefisch attending a hunting class where knowing your target was stressed.
Oh, heck, bad days happen to everyone. And you know how time flies. That must be why Kleefisch was cited in 2013 for failing to register a deer until two days after the deadline. And then he brought in only the head and cape. The rest of the venison was in the freezer. Oops, that’s another no-no.
Picky, picky, picky.
Let’s give Kleefisch his due. He just started hunting in 2003 and didn’t kill his first deer until 2011. Since then, Bambi has been on the losing end, with the score 15–0 in favor of Kleefisch. Add to that another 24 turkeys and 203 Canadian geese in the same five-year period, and, wow, the Kleefisch freezer must be full to overflow.
You might wonder when Kleefisch comes out of the woods and spends time in the legislature. Rest easy — the man is busier than a hummingbird in a field of day lilies.
He is introducing a bill that will upend the law on mentored youth hunts. At present, kids must be at least 10 years old, and only one firearm may be shared between the mentor and the child.
Kleefisch proposed removing any age limit and allowing the mentor to also carry a weapon. The measure’s supporters say parents should have the power to decide whether their children are ready to hunt.
Hey, kid, put down those Lego blocks, grab the deer rifle and let’s go kill stuff.
Wow, this is so obvious. How dare the state preempt my parental rights? Why should kids be 16 to drive? Why not 12 with a booster seat?
Certainly there is no need to make kids wait until they’re 18 to smoke cigarettes or join the military. Parents know best when Johnny is ready to put on a uniform and get blown to bits in some distant desert halfway around the world.
If you’re old enough to be turned loose in the woods with a high-powered rifle, then I say you’re old enough to climb up on a bar stool, belt down a boilermaker and sign a contract to purchase a new Humvee.
As you might expect, the first to rain on Kleefisch’s parade were the busybodies at the Wisconsin Hunter Education Association.
“Can that 1-day-old to 9-year-old differentiate between shoot (or) don’t shoot?” Joseph Lacenski, president of the group, said in remarks submitted to the Assembly natural resources committee. “Can they differentiate between what is killing vs. hunting? Can they rationalize the difference between video games they have been playing and the consequences of the real world?”
Oh, really? Fuss, fuss, fuss.
What can be wrong with legislation approved by the National Rifle Association, the gun-rights group Wisconsin FORCE, Whitetails of Wisconsin and the state bear hunters association? A cynic might think there is a connection between these groups and their generous donations to Republican legislators. Never mind that the NRA ranks among the top-10 donors to Wisconsin Republicans.
No, I think the inspiration behind this was more likely thousands of 6- to 9-year-olds who lobbied fiercely for their God-given Second Amendment right to pack heat and take on Wisconsin’s wildlife. As a parent, you know what tyrants kids can be.
Or maybe Kleefisch just got sick of spending so much money buying up excess tags so he could drop an astonishing 203 geese in five years. It would be much more economical to mentor a gaggle of 6-year-olds and fill the tag for them.
Ray Anderson, a Madison-area hunting safety instructor, submitted remarks to the natural resources committee saying he tells parents not to even enroll their children in training until they’re at least 12.
“Too many children age 10 or younger are not ready to hunt,” he wrote. “We’ve had situations in class where 9- and 10-year-olds simply don’t have the maturity to handle a firearm. They inadvertently point the firearm at others and instructors. I implore you to not pass (the bill). If anything, raise the minimum age limit to 12 or at least age 11.”
Yeah, like that’s going to happen.
And to no one’s surprise, DNR officials declined to comment, saying the agency typically doesn’t talk about pending legislation. That is, if they want to keep their jobs in this political climate.
And why must this be a partisan issue? Somewhere between red state/blue state and conservative/liberal, there must be something called common sense.
If anyone can give me a good reason why small children should be allowed to run around with firearms capable of killing people, I would like to hear from you.
And while you’re at it, take a minute and send Joel Kleefisch a recipe for goose. He surely must need it.
Joel Kleefisch
W357 N6189 Spinnaker Drive
Oconomowoc, WI 53066